All at Sea with Truffles Page 16
We followed the porter towards the far end of the building, where I could see that there were two ways out, one with a red sign over it and one with a green one. We were headed in the direction of the green one. There were several fierce-looking people standing there, dressed in the same drab outer coverings as the unpleasant man at the dock entrance when we had first arrived at Southampton. These people were waiting right by the entrance, staring - rather rudely, I thought - at everyone going past. As we were walking through, one waved his paw at Sheila and said, “Just a minute, madam, if you please.” I heard Sheila catch her breath. What now? I thought. Our porter halted the trolley, but the fierce man didn’t seem to be very interested in that. Instead, he looked down at me. “What’s that?” Oh no, not again, I thought. What IS it with these people? Haven’t any of them seen a cat before? I glared up at him. “You can’t bring an animal like that in here,” he continued. An animal like that? How dare he! I am not, repeat not, a that! I am a famous cat! My tail began to wag. It was Sheila’s turn to respond and she did indeed, showing him all my papers and the original invitation. “Well,” he puffed, “it’s all very irregular indeed. I’ve never come across such a thing before.” “There’s always a first time,” said Sheila, smiling sweetly. Don’t an… ant… antag… get him all worked up, I thought. He looks pretty nasty to me. The man pondered for a bit. Other passengers were going on through, looking at us. I was not pleased. I like to be looked at and admired, of course I do, but I do not like to be looked at for all the wrong reasons! The man gestured for us to go forward, but he told Sheila that he wanted to examine my collar. “What on earth for?” she asked. “You might have some drugs hidden inside it,” he sniffed. “Well, be my guest,” she said, “but don’t you dare let Truffles go or you’ll be in great trouble, I am telling you!” She gave him a glare that was as good as his! “Put the cat on the table,” he growled at her. I was growling too, under my breath, and my tail was whipping from side to side. Sheila lifted me up onto the table and held me tightly whilst he undid my collar. I seized my opportunity and gave him a scratch, and I was gratified to see that I had drawn blood! He said one of those words that humans shouldn’t use! I resolved never to wear that collar again once we were home, not after his horrible paws had been all over it. Ugh! He looked very closely at the collar and felt it all over inside and out - he even tried the stitching - and, of course, found nothing. “Okay, you can put it back on the cat now, madam, and carry on,” he said. Then he turned and walked off without a backward glance. Sheila, the porter and I looked at each other in disbelief for a moment, and then we too walked off!
Outside we saw Tony coming towards us with a big, welcoming smile - somewhat different from the nasty man inside! “I wondered where you’d got to,” he said. “We met a rather prickly customs man,” replied Sheila. “I’ll tell you about it later!” We walked towards the spot where Tony had parked his motor machine and the porter dumped the luggage on the ground beside it. Sheila thanked him and pressed something into his paw, and he gave me a pat on the head and walked off, making that odd whistling sound that you humans make when you’re happy.
Sheila settled herself into the motor machine, with me curled up comfortably on her lap, and we set off on the long road back to Cornwall. By this time I was feeling quite tired and so I never took much notice of what was going on outside the motor machine as we sped along, getting nearer to home every minute. I dozed. Halfway there we stopped at the place where Sheila and Tony had had the toasted tea and cakes before, and they had some more. I walked about to stretch my legs. This was probably the last time I would have to experience being on a lead. That was a nice thought. I didn’t think I could’ve stood being put on a lead every single day like a dog! Cats are just so much more independent than dogs; we don’t need leads or to be guided to where humans want us to go, we go where we want to go! And, what’s more, leadless!
Eventually we arrived back in familiar territory and Sheila woke me up as we entered our village. Tony stopped the motor machine in the driveway and we got out, both of them stretching their cramped legs after the long journey. I felt fine, as I’m used to sleeping curled up in one position for long periods! In fact, that, plus eating well, is my sole aim in life nowadays!
Sheila opened the front door and Tony heaved all the suitcases and bags into the hallway. “We seem to have twice as much as when we started,” he laughed. Sheila thanked him profusely and he patted me and said, “Oh, well, next time I see you, Truffles, I’ll have brought your mum all the way back from Southampton again, but I’ll only have to collect you from the cattery just ten minutes away!” Yes, well, don’t remind me, I thought, giving him a farewell purr! He drove away with a cheery wave and Sheila miserably surveyed the mound of luggage she would now have to haul up the stairs. I expect she was also thinking of how she would be paying for all her enjoyment by spending the next week doing nothing but washing and ironing!
Whilst she checked that everything was okay in the house, I popped out into the back garden to check (a) that it was still there, and (b) that the birds were, too. They were, and singing their hearts out - to welcome me back! Everything was back to normal. My experience on board a cruise ship, however, had been anything but normal, and I now know why it is that you humans find cruising so addictive! All the F’s - Fabulous food, a Fantasy lifestyle and, most importantly, Fun!
Happy cruising, everyone!
Truffles
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